Seventh Entry

LOG 7
March 2, 2009

Remember the "she" I mentioned on the post earlier?

I met her today. I just saw her this morning, to be precise, I don't know if she noticed me too or not.

Damn. I don't have feelings and urges towards her as strong as before but the memories are still fresh in my mind. How we used to chat from midnight until morning. How we used to eat in a restaurant, order few foods and drinks ("few" here isn't exactly few. she eats a lot ^^) and spend most of the time talking and laughing, then after almost 5 hours non-stop chatting the waitress kindly "forced" us out of our seat and continue chatting elsewhere ^^.
How she used to cheer me up when I'm gloomy. How I tried my best to impress her but end up looking clumsy. How she respond to my changing moods. How I react to her decision to be undecisive and wants everyone (literally, everyone) to be happy. How she became upset when I told her that it's TOTALLY IMPOSSIBLE and countered me that I should not view the world as black and white. How I started to realize the colors of the world - and now reduced back into grayscale.
Or when she used to laugh loudly in her room - so loud that I, who was still half asleep in my room, fell from the bed. How I used to sit on the roof at night, waiting for her to return home after attending a college preparation class at BTG. Or how lonely I feel when she returned to her hometown with her dazzling Starlet. Or how her face looked like when she's upset, confused, happy, surprised. Her face before making a decision, and after she decided to not decide ^^. How her voice changes when we talked about something serious. And her scent. I used to know if she's around me by the scent. It's not that she stinks but I just know her scent. Can't be pheromone since anyone else doesn't notice. Doesn't work well these lately though. Maybe her scent has changed. Or maybe I'm the one who has changed. Or both of us. Whatever it is, it should be connected with our current nearly-diminished realtionship... How her face looked like when she gave me my first chocolate from a girl on Valentine's day... and how I end up photographing the chocolate and put them on a "shrine" on my table...

Enough of this. I don't want to remember that anymore.

After a tiresome Pleno Meeting today, and my worries because my sister is now in a hospital and my dad is sick - and both of them show the symptoms of Dengue Fever, I just need something that clear my mind up. Not more of those nostalgic memories!

I'm a fan of Techno and New Age music anyways, so I'll listen to them and dance all night (like I used to do when I was waiting for her ~ ARRRGH!)... The memories aren't as overwhelming as it used to be but now it's PESKY as hell!

anyways, tonight I'll listen to some DJ Sammy, "Ray of Light", Gorillaz, and something new: Hatsune Miku. Yep, that's the Vocaloid Hatsune Miku.
This one is wonderful for new-age / techno listeners who want a refreshing tune: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3L0g7GBVPLA

Miku's electronic voice (an artificial voice works really good on techno / new age) and the upbeat but soothing mix, carries me away.. and matches my nostalgic mood somehow... Info for those who doesn't know, Miku Hatsune is an icon of Vocaloid, a kind of artificial voice software. That means, you can make a song without any singer by filling inputs such as lyrics, notes, beat, etc. Then let the software process it for you, and voila! A song with Miku's voice completed! It's way more complicated than "Microsoft Sam" computer voice for handicapped users...

found Miku at dannychoo.com
** Danny Choo's Otaku side of the Force is strong. I can't imagine how a Stormtrooper has a huge influence of the Force like a Jedi... Ai no Corrida! ^^ **
some danny action here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t7X9MQi7uOU
he's a one lucky bastard ^^